Forgiveness

Can you truly forgive someone for causing years of pain and deception? Can you recover and continue a life with that person? Is forgiveness possible if you don't remove yourself from the situation? Is it really as easy as making a choice to forgive or not to forgive? Is it easier if you make a new life first then forgive the past life? Do you ever really forgive someones actions or just go with the motions to appear as you have until you suffocate? Do you sacrifice your happiness to give others theirs? Even if deep down you wanted to forgive knowing that harboring ill feelings towards someone does not create a sense of peace within, how do you go about the process of letting go? Ultimately if you don't embrace forgiveness you end up being the one who pays most dearly. We know that by embracing forgiveness, you embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy. We just need to know how to get to that point......

Let's define forgiveness: There is no one great answer to this question. In general, forgiveness is a decision to let go of resentments and thoughts of revenge. Forgiveness is the act of untying yourself from thoughts and feelings that bind you to the offense(s) committed against you.

Does forgiving someone condone what they did or forget the actions? No, not at all. Forgiving isn't the same as forgetting what happened to you. The act that caused you pain may always remain a part of your life. But forgiveness can lessen its grip on you and help you focus on other, amazing positive parts of your life. Forgiveness also doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act.

Interestingly enough research has been done to people who have forgiven and those who hold the grudge. The results show the following benefits to forgiveness.

• Lower blood pressure
• Stress reduction
• Less hostility
• Better anger management skills
• Lower heart rate
• Lower risk of alcohol or substance abuse
• Fewer depression symptoms
• Fewer anxiety symptoms
• Reduction in chronic pain
• More friendships
• Healthier relationships
• Greater religious or spiritual well-being
• Improved psychological well-being

Also, remember that forgiveness often isn't a one-time thing. It begins with a decision, but because memories or another set of words or actions may trigger old feelings, you may need to recommit to forgiveness over and over again. You make the choice to do this.

If the person who has hurt you is no longer in your daily life sometimes it feels easier to forgive because you are not constantly reminded of things that took place. Often those who hurt us are the people closest to us. It's unfortunate, but true.

If you really think about it, life is too short not to forgive. Why waste what time you do have alive spending your days depressed, bitter, and angry about the past? Let go of those ill feelings and embrace a new you and watch your desires come to life! Refocus your energy on things that make you happy. Start a yoga class, or go biking, take a vacation to clear your head. In some cases leaving the very situation or relationship that is causing you pain is the best option. You can regain clarity and make your own decisions that create the life you want. In other cases working together with the one who has hurt you if this is a possibility can be a wonderful thing.

The process of letting go starts with you. You make a choice to hold onto the grudge or not to. Ask yourself how you are benefiting from these actions? Is how you're feeling helping you? Is this who you want to be? What can you do to open the doors to the forgiving process? Think about these questions and answer them. Start a journal and write your thoughts down. Even if all you do is write about the very things that hurt you, never read it, then destroy the papers you are learning to release those feelings. Talk with someone you trust who can be unbiased as you let go of these feelings. Once you accomplish your goals you will notice a tremendous difference in how you feel, how often you smile, who you are surrounded by and more.

Here is a good question: What if you are the very person who needs to be forgiven? How do you forgive yourself? A good start would be spending some time thinking about the offense(s) you've committed and trying to determine the effect it has had on others. Unless it may cause more harm, consider admitting the wrong you've done to those you've harmed, speaking from the heart of your sincere sorrow or regret, and specifically asking for forgiveness — without making excuses for your actions. Know that you can't force someone to forgive you either. You may need to exercise patience during this process as well.

In any case, we have to be willing to forgive ourselves. Holding on to resentment against yourself can be just as toxic as holding on to resentment against others. Recognize that poor behavior or mistakes don't make you worthless or insignificant. As long as you are able to recognize your actions to have been harmful to another you are moving in the right direction to freeing yourself for a life filled with peace, compassion, and joy!

Driving up east side

For our annual trip I took the girls on a two day drive up to PA, NJ, and NY. We ended day one in Fayetteville, NC for the night. The drive was easy and the girls travel well. We were loaded with the essentials from our luggage to snacks and games needed to make the drive more enjoyable. Day two we cruised through by mapquest directions without a GPS and well we added about 2.5 hours to our drive, but eventually we made it to our first destination Allentown, PA. My oldest brother his wife and their 4 daughters live here. We spent 24 hours catching up, watching the cousins play together and taking our traditional stroll through Trexler Park across the street from their house. The day we were to leave we stopped at Wegman's and bought a few groceries and bagels for the family. On the way to the car I spotted a couple dollar bills and told the girls to get them. I looked about 2 feet ahead and spotted a $20. Lucky me! I looked around to be sure I wasn't on hidden camera being watched and lucky for me not a soul was in the parking lot (it was early). Nice start to the trip I thought.....

After leaving PA we were off to our next destination....Stanhope, NJ to visit one of my oldest friends Josh (we go back to our early teen years), his beautiful wife who I adore Lora, her daughter Ava, and their son Luke. They welcomed us into their home with open arms and made us feel so special. The kids had so much fun playing together the entire week! It was truly the most relaxing part of the trip being around good friends.

I have a blast with my girls they love to have fun just like their mommy. Normally this trip is a 4 person family trip, but that was not the case this summer. Jeremy had major things come up he needed to deal with and not to disappoint the girls from this long lived planned trip I took them alone. Having saved their money for 6 months to make a visit to the American Girl Store located in Manhattan, NY to purchase their own special gifts it was a must to get there. How fun it was to take the girls into for the second year in a row a store with girls in mind it was a memorable trip. We also spent another day in the city just tooling around taking photos wherever we could.

The trip was cut shorter than I had wanted it to so visiting my grandmother on Long Island was not an option this time around I'm sad to say. I promised to make it up to her with an extra trip back up in the fall.

Going home was a bit tougher due to the traffic on NJ turnpike at some points I sat still for an hour! Once things got moving we made good time. For our overnight we stopped in Rocky Point, NC. Made it home by dinner time on day two.

Now back and caught up it's time to plan out the fall schedule for school, classes, gymnastics, field trips, and more.....enjoy life it is full of amazing opportunities and learning experiences.

Two Choices

This was sent in an email to me once and I wanted to share it.....


Be a natural motivator.

If someone you care about was having a bad day, you should be there telling them how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Each morning you wake up and say to yourself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or....you can choose to be in a bad mood. You should choose to be in a good mood.

Each time something bad happens, you can choose to be a victim or...You can choose to learn from it. You should choose to learn from it.

Every time someone comes to you complaining, you can choose to accept their complaining or...You can point out the positive side of life. You should choose the positive side of life.

Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood.

You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life.

You should learn that every day we have the choice to live fully.

Attitude, after all, is everything.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

Vegan Asian Peanut Noodle Dish

This dish was made at a potluck event by a friend of mine Katie Cooperstein. I have made it many times and always make it slightly different each time. These are some of my favorite flavors! Enjoy:~)

You will need:
1 package Soba Noodles (cooked as directed on package)
1 pound tofu, firm, dried and stir fried

Marinate stir fried tofu in the following:
Gingerk to taste
1 clove minced Garlic
1/4 cup Tamari

Peanut Sauce:
1 cup organic peanut butter
2 cloves garlic minced
6 tablespoons Tamari
6 tablespoons Balsamic
2 tablespoons Organic Sugar
1/8 tsp cayenne
1/2 tsp salt
1 cup hot water

Add all the ingredients to a bowl and whisk together. Adjust ingredients as necessary for taste. Pour over noodles.

Optional is have some broccoli to go with or your choice of vegetables.

Dissecting Deodorant!

So if you are any bit holistic or know that traditional deodorant has been linked to cause cancer (especially in the breast) and other major illnesses. Then maybe you are ready for something new that actually works! I have tried several store bought versions Tom's, Jason, Kiss my Face just to name a few....none of which actually did the job properly or had an overpowering fragrance or an essential oil that burned the tender skin.

Let us start by breaking down the ingredients found in traditional deodorants.

Aluminum is one of the most common elements in the environment and the world's most common metal. It is used in cans and aluminum foil, as lightweight sheet metal in airplanes and other machinery, in electrical wiring - and in personal care products such as underarm deodorant and antiperspirant. Aluminum oxide, also present in deodorants, is often used as a coating and is the major compound in rubies and sapphires.

Aluminum Compounds in Deodorant & Antiperspirant locks poisons in. The problem with deodorants and antiperspirants is not only the aluminum, but how it works to reduce sweat and smelly odors. Aluminum compounds or aluminum salts, such as aluminum oxide (Al2O3), are key ingredients in almost every antiperspirant. They are powerful astringents that close pores, stopping sweat and odor from escaping the body. Just Google it and you will find all kinds of info. Pay attention to the source because the companies selling the product will tell you it is all harmless and causes no damage to the body or the environment!

Antiperspirants may leave the outside of the body smelling fresh and clean – but inside, the toxins that would have escaped the body in the sweat have nowhere to go. For this reason, antiperspirants have been linked to problems with the sweat glands and lymph glands in and around the underarms.

The first thing you must do whenever you buy deodorant or any product that goes on your skin or in your body is to read the ingredients. They’re usually in very tiny print on the back of the label. If you have trouble reading small print, carry a magnifying glass around with you so you can read before you buy. This is critical because what you put on your skin can be absorbed directly into your bloodstream. And harmful ingredients in your blood can have potentially deadly effects on your body.

Here are 7 ingredients to avoid when choosing your deodorant:

Aluminum chlorohydrate, aluminum zirconium tetrachlorohydrex gly or any aluminum compounds. Aluminum is absorbed through the skin and accumulates in the body. It has been suggested that there is an association between aluminum and Alzheimer’s disease.

Parabens (methyl, ethyl, propyl, benzyl and butyl), are all derived from toluene, a toxic petrochemical derivative. Toluene is toxic if swallowed or inhaled. It is also harmful in contact with the skin. There is some evidence that repeated exposure to toluene may cause reproductive harm. Since 2000, 13 research studies have shown that various types of parabens act like estrogen in animals and in tissue culture. Estrogen is known to drive the growth of cancerous cells.

Triclosan is a skin irritant and may cause contact dermatitis. It may kill healthy bacteria as well as harmful bacteria. It may contain carcinogenic contaminants. It is stored in body fat and is classified as a pesticide by the FDA.

Talc is classified as a carcinogen by the International Agency for Research on Cancer if it contains asbestiform fibers. The quantity of asbestiform fibers in cosmetic grade talc is unregulated. If talc is listed on the label, there is no way of knowing whether or not it contains asbestiform fibers.

Propylene glycol absorbs quickly through the skin and is a penetration enhancers. It may cause delayed allergic reactions. NIOSH says propylene glycol is a neurotoxin and may cause kidney or liver damage. The EPA says it’s not fully investigated for carcinogenic potential.

Silica is a skin irritant. It may be contaminated with crystalline quartz, which is a carcinogen.

Steareth-n (n may be any number like say 100), may be vegetable derived but is reacted with ethylene oxide (ethoxylated), a known human carcinogen.

Instead choose deodorants with ingredients like vegetable glycerin, natural preservatives like bioflavanoids and lichen, herbs or herbal extracts, de-ionized water or distilled water, green tea, aloe vera, baking soda and essential oils.

A word of caution: Plant extracts listed on labels can already contain parabens and propylene glycol. These do not have to be listed on the label. Very few herbs supplied to manufacturers are free of parabens or other synthetic preservatives unless they are extracted in vegetable glycerine. To make sure that the products you buy are healthy and free of these harmful chemicals, call the deodorant manufacturer and ask them for detailed information.

Dr. Christine H. Farlow, D.C. is "The Ingredients Investigator." She has been researching ingredient safety since 1991. To learn more about the safety of ingredients in your deodorant, visit www.DyingToLookGood.com

Now that you have armed yourselves with information on something as small as deodorant that can affect a lot more then how your armpit smells. Here is a recipe discovered online by my friend Heidi Crawford. She tried it and then shared the recipe with me to try. I can tell you I am seriously hooked!

1/4 Cup Arrowroot Powder
1/4 Cup Baking Soda
2-4 Tablespoons Coconut Oil

Mix it all until it forms a paste. Add less oil for a solid texture add more oil for a runnier texture. I removed a failing natural deodorant from a screw rub on and filled it up with this recipe instead and I love it! I will admit I am not a big sweater and this will not stop the release of sweat (the natural way our bodies remove toxins) what it does is eliminates any odor! No B.O. all day long!

Another alternative is Salt spray. Sold at healthfood stores. Spray on some liquid salt water and that helps eliminate odor....but not as well as the recipe I wrote above.

Live and learn and stay clean because no one wants to smell your B.O. and no one wants to smear aluminum all over their bodies either!

__________________

Losing the animals

A little history....once upon a time I ate animals not a lot and I was selective on the kind. I could once be found eating chickens, turkey, your assorted sea life, and yes, even steak although it was never my favorite and that ended sometime in 1994. As time went on and I became more in tune with my body and the new choices I wanted to make. Thankfully change is welcomed by me. I adapt easily and love to do unique and often considered *oddball* things. I was never a milk drinker and was not able to digest large quantities of dairy so I remained limited on those items. I didn't envision myself giving up seafood, but when I suddenly suffered severe anaphylactic shock and landed in the ER in 1999 that came to a screeching halt as well. Poor me!

I have always preferred eating healthy over not because it created better benefits within me. More energy, more clarity, more longevity, more quality of life, more motivation....I was not your typical child growing up either. I did not want candy, soda and traditional junkfood items. You would never catch me throwing a tantrum at the checkout line of a grocery store insisting my parent buy the candy for me! Those items never appealed to me because they weren't normal for us in our house. I agree that if a child does not have access to those junkfoods in their home or see them being used as "treats or rewards" (I often hear parents saying) they are less likely to want them or eat them elsewhere. I truly feel these items are highly addictive and are the cause of so much illness. I do believe things in moderation will not damage beyond repair. It's all a choice one makes. Today we have so many alternatives to choose from to make the switch from unhealthy to healthy.

I made a lot of extreme changes with my food choices once I became pregnant with my first child. I did not want anything "bad" entering my body for her sake. From that point on I continued on the educating myself by doing a lot of research something I always enjoy on nutrition.

Diet alters every part of our life inside and out. It’s that simple. Having a good healthy lifestyle doesn’t mean you are untouchable to disease or sickness it just means the life you do lead is higher quality and potentially easier at fighting such obstacles.

Weight gain is not hereditary it is a learned behavior and a lazy quality people possess along with allowing emotional baggage to run your life. You can have two obese parents who feed their child well ultimately they grow up making good food choices for themselves and are slender. You can have extremely fit parents who feed their kids crap all day at home and at school add in no exercise or physical activity and they will become obese. I know people who are super fit and exercise regularly and yet they have fat kids who are now getting diabetes! One of my pet peeves! You care enough about your own health, but won't take control of your child's? That's crazy to me!

In recent years say the last 10 I have altered my husband's diet gradually (he resists change not as much now as he did in the past). Today my husband is vegan all the way! Which means he no longer eats animals, dairy, or any animal by-products. Instead he consumes a plant based diet. He began a 3 week challenge a friend of ours started and he felt so good he continued. It has now been 4 months and he has lost 40+ pounds! His weight was getting out of control. I could feed him well at home with healthy choices and the second he left the house he was hitting the fast food places. He ate late into the night and consumed large portions of sweets. He grew up entirely different then I did. End of story. Now he looks great, feels great, and shares his story with everyone! Our friends are amazed at the transition. I am so proud of him for making this choice and sticking to it and I know all the animals in the world are too! We are lucky enough to have many restaurants to choose from that cater to vegans. Some of our favorites are Ethos , Cafe 118 even restaurants who don't have vegans as their main patron still offer incredible dishes Season's 52 , PF Changs , Loving Hut has many locations all over the US these are just a select few we visit in our area.

People look down on the Vegan lifestyle and that is so silly to me. They say "it costs more to go that route" and I always ask how so? If you eliminate meat, processed foods, soda, and excess junk snacks from your grocery bill do you realize how much money you save? Buying more produce instead is still not spiking up the grocery bill. Purchasing alternative items are readily available and taste good! Your food is fresh and makes you feel great. No more depression, anxiety, sleepless nights, confusion, short tempers....all of these behaviors are a direct reflection of the foods you consume. Go see Food, Inc Surrounding yourself with like minded people is what will set you apart from the rest. Reach out for a support system believe me they are out there!

Eggs and dairy products are not essential for optimum health. They contain saturated fat and dietary cholesterol, and eating them can inhibit the absorption of iron. On a balanced vegan diet there is no risk of calcium, iron or protein deficiency. In fact, consuming dairy products can actually lead to osteoporosis and weak bones. This is because eggs and dairy products are rich in animal protein, which makes the blood more acidic. The body tries to neutralize this by drawing calcium from the bones. Scientific studies show that a plant-based diet is ideal for optimum health and lowers your risk of heart disease, obesity, diabetes and some cancers, as well as increasing your life expectancy.

Challenge yourself for 3 weeks and see how it goes. Be serious and stay on track and you will be amazed at the difference! Watch this funny interview from The Daily Show Jon Stewart talking to Robert Kenner see below:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Robert Kenner
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Jason Jones in Iran

This could not be MORE TRUE!!!

Gemini: Gemini’s best quality is versatility. The worst quality is changeableness. A key phrase is “I think.” Being a mutable sign, Gemini is changeable, and this can be the best or worst of qualities. Your versatility allows you to learn a little about just about everything and to develop skills in many areas. This makes for a good executive or manager, as you are able to oversee multiple activities and keep track of many projects at once. Other people can almost see the wheels turning. Gemini appears to be open-minded. Yet a time comes when no more oddball ideas can be wedged into the system. Then Gemini draws upon skillful thought processes to decide what to keep and what to discard.

Gemini is a mental sign, often intellectually driven. The capacity for communication includes both listening and telling, and thus you make wonderful companions and writers. Where Taurus wants physical expression, Gemini seeks out mentally challenging activities. You like the learning process. Gemini is intuitive, able to see into the future and gauge the results of your actions – another worthy executive trait.

The Gemini temperament is volatile in the true meaning of this term. You can vaporize at a relatively low temperature and you seem to be able to fly. Some people see this as the fickleness of a butterfly flitting from one flower to the next. The strength is in the ability to rise above the pettiness of situations to see the larger picture. Your mantra might be, “It just doesn’t matter.” Gemini is dexterous of hand, eye and wit, able to turn a situation or conversation in a new direction at will.

In spite of apparent adaptability, Gemini is sensitive at heart. You are aware of what others are thinking and feeling, and often take a diplomatic path to avoid hurting others. This could be at your own expense, although you don’t let us know it. Tolerance should not be mistaken for a lack of emotional depth. Gemini’s part of the body is the arms and lungs. Monochromatic or bright colors are best.